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How many anarchists does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, the lightbulb must change itself.

IMF Resistance’s Poetic Response to the Haters

 

IMFresistance just released their newspaper (pdf) for the weekend of actions. In it you’ll find this sassy little poem:

We know we shouldn’t riot but it feels too good to stop

Even though Naomi tells us that it’s wrong to summit hop

From Bookchin down to Rebick, the same old glum refrain

Be sober and responsible, our struggle’s not a game

But in all our local projects we’ve yet to feel the joy

Of masking up and throwing down to make total destroy

A fl aming dumpster in the street’s a sight we thrill to see

Especially when hurtling toward five-O’s APC

Some might say we have a problem, but we can’t quite seem to care

When smoke from burning cop cars begins drifting through the air

A masked-up crowd, a teargas haze: to us a joyful frolic

But NEFAC keeps insisting that it’s all merely symbolic

There might be a 12 step program but we haven’t really looked

The sticky part for us would be admitting that we’re hooked

But if you’re a riot junkie too and need to get your kicks

Then come to DC in the spring – ‘cause we’ve got your next fix

Haters gonna hate.

IMFresistance.org

 

What’s the difference between 9/11 and a cow?

The right-wing doesn’t know how to milk a cow.

An older revolutionary walks across the Brooklyn Bridge one day…

An older revolutionary walks across the Brooklyn Bridge one day…

He sees a man of similar age, standing on the edge, looking like he’s about to jump. He rushes over and says, “STOP! Don’t do it!”

The jumper asks, “Why shouldn’t I?”

“Well, there’s so much to live for!”

“I’m just depressed; I’ve been a Communist all my life and the revolution
seems as far away as ever.”

“You’re a Communist?”

“Yeah, why do you ask?”

“I am too! Did you originally join the Communist Party USA?”

“Yes…”

“Me too! Did you join the pro-Trotsky Communist League of America in 1928, which later merged with the American Workers Party to form the Workers Party of America in 1934?”

“hmmm, I did…”

“Crazy, so did I! After the WPA was expelled from the Socialist Party of America in 1936, did you then go on to join the Socialist Workers Party USA and the fourth international?”

“I did actually…”

“Me too! In the 1940 dispute did you side with Cannon or Shachtman?”

“Cannon!”

“Wow, me too! In 1962 did you join Robertson’s opposition caucus, the
Revolutionary Tendency?”

“Yes, I did…”

” Holly shit! And of course like me you were expelled and went on to join the International Communist League (Spartacist)”

“…well, that goes without saying!”

“In 1985, did you join the International Bolshevik Tendency who claimed that the Sparts have degenerated into an ‘obedience cult’”

“No way!”

“Nah, me neither. In 1998 did you join the Internationalist Group after the Permanent Revolution Faction were expelled from the ICL?”

“Yeah! I can’t believe this!”

After connecting with another old-guard revolutionary, the jumper begins to rethink his decision to end his life. “Maybe I won’t….”

Just as soon as the jumper begins abandon his suicidal thoughts, the first Communist suddenly shoves him off of the bridge. “Die, counter-revolutionary scum!” he screams, as the second Communist plummets to his death.

Punk Outreach (image)

What’s the difference between a cop and a dartboard?

photo by http://www.flickr.com/photos/bogdansuditu/2377844553/

Dartboards don’t bleed when you throw things at them.

A six year old is watching cable news with his father one day…

A six year old is watching cable news with his father one day. At one point, he turns to his father and asks, “Dad, what is politics?”

Dad thinks for a moment and answers, “Well, let me try to explain it this way. I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me ‘capitalism’. Mommy is the administrator of our finances, so we’ll call her ‘government’. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you ‘the people’. The nanny, well, consider her ‘the working class’. Your baby sister has a lot of growing up to do, so we’ll call her ‘the future’. Now go think about it and see if it makes sense.

The little boy goes off to bed thinking about what his father has said. Later that night, he hears his baby sister crying and runs to her room only to find that her diapers are very soiled. So the little boy goes to his parents’ room. Mom is sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny’s room. Finding the door locked, he looks through the peep-hole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed, his sister still crying.

The next morning, at breakfast, the little boy says to his father, “Dad, I think I understand what politics is now.”

“Good son, tell me what you think.”

The little boy replies, “Well, while capitalism is fucking the working class, the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is in deep shit.”

Why did the tofu cross the road?

To prove it wasn’t chicken!
via Reddit


So you broke something at a protest. Are you an anarchist? (Infographic)

So you’re pissed about the economy. You’re pissed about 10 years of wars. You’re pissed about rising education prices. So you go to a protest. One thing leads to another and you broke something. WHAT NOW? Oh shit, are you an anarchist? Follow this easy diagram to determine if you are an anarchist:

How do you make a cop sound like a dog?

Pour gas and light a match. WOOF.

bark bark bark WOOF